The Ten People You’ll Meet at Sunday’s Football Party
The single biggest day of the year for football watching is this Sunday and whether you're planning to watch with a group of friends, or a group of strangers at a bar, this is your warning. You're probably going to have some sort of encounter with at least one of these types of people.
In reality, the halftime show is really just one big choreographed, lip-synching show, but that doesn't matter to this person. This person cares more about what could possibly happen during the halftime show than whatever crazy play just happened on the field.
Much like the halftime fanatic, the commercial addict cares nothing about the actual game. They're generally quiet while the game is in play, but as soon as the commercials come on, this person comes out of their shell and drones on and on about each and every commercial.
A lot of people place bets on the game, but this person is going to have their eyes on their cell phone more than they do on the TV screen and they're either going to be really happy or really nervous. The whole time.
Ugh. Nobody likes a know-it-all and that's exactly what this person is. They think because they played football in high school that they're an expert on the sport and they'll matter of factly dissect every play.
This is the guy or gal who's football knowledge is limited to the name of the team quarterbacks. They literally know nothing more about the game, but they pretend to have a deep interest in whatever the "expert" (see #4) has to say. This person is a faker. They're faking because they want to be liked.
This person just wants to fit in. Desperately. So, throw them a bone. Take them under your wing and bring them into your group instead of being a jerk and mocking them.
Ah, yes. The person who lingers by the food table. Or by the grill. Or who takes the prime seat on the couch, not for the best view of the game, but to be the closest to all the snacks.
This person's favorite team stinks. No, really. Their team is awful. Like Cleveland bad. And yet, they won't give up the argument that all their team needs is that one key player to turn everything around.
This is the person who will disagree with anything and everything the broadcasters have to say. The only time this person is justified is if Joe Buck is speaking.
This person has no concept of personal space. This is the person who wants to touch hands. With everyone. In the form of high fives. They will literally get up out of their seat and command hand slaps from everyone, even those clearly not interested in touching hands with a stranger. Hand sanitizer, anyone?