Most American Women Think Feminists Are ‘Too Extreme’
I was raised in a home where we were taught the wife didn't work, but instead stayed home and took care of the house and children while the husband made the money. I was raised to believe that while the husband and wife discussed things, the man made the final decision.
That was of thinking most definitely hasn't stepped into my own grown up family life. My husband and I are both in 100% when it comes to decision making and bill paying. When there's a big decision to make, we discuss and we compromise. Neither of us trumps the other. Granted, if Jay told me not to go buy a thousand dollar item at the store, I wouldn't because he probably checked the bank account and saw we didn't have a thousand dollars to spend. However, I don't see this as him dictating my life or decisions. I see this as him looking out for us and our finances. On the other hand, if he told me I couldn't have lunch with friends while he's working and had no good reason why (which has never happened), I'd see that as him unfairly dictating me and I would go to lunch with my friends.
While I love that Jay and I are a team when it comes to finances and major decisions, I absolutely love when he opens the car door for me, or refuses to let me cart around heavy things. Or when it's raining and he pulls the car up to the door at the store so that I don't get drenched. I love the feeling of being treated like a lady.
I think in the quest to prove our independence and right to make decisions, we've pushed men away from doing things like opening doors and pulling out chairs for us. And this makes me sad. However, I was happy to stumble on a YouGov survey which found that 53% say they're not feminists, though just over a quarter (26%) say that they are feminists. Maybe we're opening ourselves back up to being treated like ladies?
When asked why they weren't feminists, the most common response was that 'feminists are too extreme', followed by 'feminists are anti-men.' 11% of non-feminists said they weren't feminists because they believe men and women are not equal.
If you think that younger women are the ones saying they're feminist, while older women aren't, you'd be right. But the gap is actually pretty small. 30% of women under the age of 30 say they're feminists, while 27% of women over the age of 65 say they're feminists.