Tis the season to be tipping, fa la la la la    la la la la.

It's that time of year, time to figure out what we should tip to those that do things for us.   I refer to the 'Complete Idiot's Guide to Etiquette' because if an idiot can't guide me through the holidays, then who can.  Here's what the idiots say.

Babysitter or nanny: One week's pay and a small gift.  I tried to give the babysitter the gift of laughter once by telling what I thought was a funny joke....What kind of lights did Noah use on the Ark?  I'll give the answer at the end.  The babysitter didn't appreciate the gift and in hindsight I don't blame her.

Trash collectors: They say should be tipped 15 to 20 dollars per person.  I hear that the trash collectors at my place have muttered the words, "Don't they ever tie the garbage bags" from time to time.  Sorry about that.

Paper Carrier: 15-25 dollars for daily delivery and 5-15 dollars for weekend delivery.  I really feel bad for the carriers.  When I delivered the paper


 growing up, I also would collect at the end of the week.  I actually saw who I was delivering too and would sometimes chat. So when the holidays rolled around, I would get a nice present.  Nowadays, you can pay your bill on-line.  I never saw our carrier and have no idea who they were. 

Finally the Hairdresser:  The equivalent of one session (that sounds like some big words for the idiot etiquette people.)  I realize that this is for the ladies. It also says to pay 25 dollars if you're not a regular salon-goer.  That would be more than all my sessions combined.  I see my hair stylist(?) twice a year.  I always go on a wednesday because it's only 11 bucks.  I tried to give her coupons once.  She appreciated that as much as the babysitter liked my gift of laughter.  The answer is "Flood lights" by the way.

I say it doesn't take an idiot to figure out what you should tip, but I don't mind if an idiot helps me out.  I