I Haven’t Done Laundry in a Few Months (For a Good Reason)

I haven’t done laundry in 19 weeks.

Well I have done laundry, I just haven’t washed my Eagles jersey upwards of 5 months. It doesn’t smell, it does have stains, and yes, it is wrinkled. I don’t care. I don’t wear it to tell people my allegiances, I wear it because I am exhaustingly superstitious.

It’s a black colored jersey, strategically chosen, so it doesn’t show any wing or beer stains. My college co-host “Staten Island” Joe purchased it for me years back for $5, and it’s the only Birds jersey I haven’t outgrown. Its been worn 19 weeks in a row and is still going strong. It has been sprayed with Febreze and steamed multiple times.

I almost washed the jersey last night. Panic set in. I quickly snatched it out of the washer.

This morning I noticed the jersey was wrinkled and needed a little steaming. I steam in my shower because I have yet to buy an actual steamer, and because I’m a little cheap.

I steamed my amazing smelling jersey for about 20 minutes whole I cooked and ate my breakfast. I checked on the jersey and it was nice and crisp and ready for Sunday.

I turned the water off for a few minutes while I brushed my teeth. I then switched the nozzle back on and immediately jumped back in the shower assuming the water was hot.

It was not.

I used up all my hot water for my superstitious jersey. Go Birds!