Back Talk – The Surprise Kiss

Question from Kim:

I went on a blind date with this guy named Jay last weekend, and I didn’t feel like we had anything in common. He was attractive enough, but there was just no spark of any kind – from either of us. Which is why I was surprised when he planted a hugely romantic kiss on me after the date. I was totally caught off guard and still didn’t feel anything, but Jay seemed suddenly enthusiastic about me and I couldn’t help but wonder where that enthusiasm had been the past two hours we’d spent together. Why do guys do that? Was he interested the whole time but just couldn’t tell me? Did he just want to see what he could get at the end of the date? Thoughts?

My Answer:

Kim, there are some things to consider here. Let's not jump to conclusions thinking he was just trying to get into your pants. He may have been nervous! It could take more than two hours for him to warm up and get comfortable in that type of situation. He obviously doesn't do any "picking up" if you were on a blind date. I would be concerned if he was too confident in this situation anyway.

Let's look at the facts. 1. You don't know him, he doesn't know you. 2. He didn't approach you in a public setting to ask you out, showing any confidence. 3. Blind dates are often set up by others or the internet as a medium. So your VERY FIRST contact was at the first date.

You and he should be nervous! I'm guessing he was awkwardly satisfied with the date enough to toss out that kiss. Which believe it or not, was a really hard thing to do if he was scared witless to begin with. If he seems excited now that the first date is out of the way and he didn't get the nose slapped off of him after that kiss, you should try another date. If he's more comfy you could click together. If you feel the same after the second date, you know like he could be your brother? Tell him that you think you'd make better friends, or that you don't think you two are compatible in the way you are looking for... No harm done, and he got a wicked great kiss from an incredible girl!